Shelf Defense: Alphabet Juice, The Consolation of Philosophy
In late 2011 I decided, in the hopes of keeping my library down to a manageable size, to comb through the unread sections in alphabetical order. It was a naïve, Sisyphean project, and it will take forever—so I’d better get moving. Shelf Defense is my occasional notebook about what I dig up, from Alphabet Juice to Point Omega.
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ROY BLOUNT JR., ALPHABET JUICE (2008)
WHY DO I OWN THIS?: Because Munro’s in Victoria had it remaindered in 2009, and because I enjoy little factoids about words and why they sound strange.
THOUGHTS: This is a tough thing to write about, because Blount’s project is to celebrate the elastic, plummy, sonicky (his word) qualities of language—so my sentences are feeling extra self-conscious today. Alphabet Juice is a direct retort to linguists who claim that the relationship between words and their meanings is arbitrary. As proof, Blount wades knee-deep into several dictionaries at once, taking us through the alphabet letter by letter and pointing out the ways in which certain ideas need certain kinds of words to describe them. This goes well beyond onomatopoeia. (Take the sphinx, a mythic, riddle-spouting creature that strangled its victims; saying the word sphinx physically makes your throat contract). It’s a joyous yet calming book, one that forced me to re-assess a bunch of my own lazy writing habits. It’s partly self-help, too. When introducing the word ipsilateral, Blount writes, “This is not a word that you’ll ever need, but I thought it might cheer you up.”
KEEP OR SELL: Keep.
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BOETHIUS, THE CONSOLATION OF PHILOSOPHY (524, TRANS. VICTOR WATTS)
WHY DO I OWN THIS?: Because I thought it might help me in my Chaucer class in 2007. Who knows? Maybe it would have.
THOUGHTS: If I were about to be brutally executed for a bogus crime, I doubt I would sit down and write an elegant treatise on everything I’ve ever learned about philosophy. But thank goodness Boethius did—for a long time this was key connective tissue in the West’s understanding of some essential ancient myths and texts. The Canterbury Tales draws heavily on his modified wheel of fortune concept. (Later, so would Pat Sajak.) The bigger surprise, though, is that it’s mostly a treat to read, even now. Boethius imagines the personification of philosophy visiting him in jail, and methodically dismantling all of his fears and dilemmas about this mortal coil he was about to depart. Then, near the end, it goes into some pretty bland hair-splitting about God and free will and blah blah blah. Let’s do some quotes!
Yes, rise up on my wheel if you like, but don’t count it an injury when by the same token you begin to fall.
And:
What a splendid thing power is, when we find it insufficient even for its own preservation!
And my personal favourite:
Perhaps you think that beauty means being resplendent in clothing of every variety: but if the clothing catches my eye, my admiration will be directed at either the quality of the material or the skill of the tailor … If Nature gives them their beauty, how does it involve you?
KEEP OR SELL: Keep.
May 22, 2012Kevin Barry, City of Bohane
Violence and language are indeed the raisons d’être here. Barry’s novel is not one for three-dimensional characters, or the careful unpacking of social issues. He’s content to toss a bunch of stock noir characters—the over-ambitious lieutenant, the femme fatale, the wise old matriarch—into his Irish wasteland, then let them beat each other to a pulp.
To be fair, it’s a pretty great pulp. Read my full review of City of Bohane, from Sunday’s Edmonton Journal, here.
May 21, 2012Up to a certain point, I’m telling myself, ‘No, I’m not yet writing. I’m just putting down ideas.’ Then, at a certain point, I tell myself, ‘Everything is already there. Now I just have to edit it.’ So that’s the idea: to split it into two. I put down notes; I edit it. Writing disappears.
Slavoj Zizek, from the documentary Zizek!
This is the only piece of writing advice I will 100% get behind. It’s perfect. I think about it all the time—as recently as an hour ago.
May 20, 2012
Complaining of the gods above / Down to hell he went for love.
Is this the kind of thing silly people get tattooed across their wrists? I don’t care. I like it.
(From The Consolation of Philosophy.)
May 18, 2012
Earthworm Jim and Snot from Earthworm Jim 2 (SNES and Genesis; 1995-1996) developed by Shiny Entertainment of Laguna Beach, California.
I was Earthworm Jim crazy as a kid! I had all the games and toys and watched the TV show and everything. Which is exactly what the Playmates corporation wanted. It’s not well-known, but the EWJ franchise was originally intended to be an action figure line with a game, rather than a game with some action figures.
Suggested by @mhingston
Want J.J. to draw your favourite American video game character? Of course you do.
In the meantime, here’s one of mine.
May 18, 2012At the sight of the Muses of Poetry at my bedside dictating words to accompany my tears, she became angry. ‘Who,’ she demanded, her piercing eyes alight with fire, ‘has allowed these hysterical sluts to approach this sick man’s bedside?’
The classics!
(From Boethius’s Consolation of Philosophy, written just before his execution in 524.)
May 17, 2012This is the story that won me a dollar-store trophy full of Jolly Ranchers at last Saturday’s Wordcrawl. (A romance novel and Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots were also involved in the final round. I won’t get into that part here.)
It’s about an editorial meeting at a student newspaper, where they’re deciding whether to start including a Sudoku puzzle in future issues. Eagle-eyed readers may recognize it as part of “Comic Sans,” which was published here a few years back.
Also, a warning: it’s 100% unattributed dialogue. Enjoy!
May 15, 2012